History=92s Worst Decisions (Stephen Weir, 2005), History=92s Greatest=20
Scandals (Ed Wright et. al, 2006), (Murdoch Books/Pier 9).
If you want to occupy part of your holidays =96 as I have just done =96=20
reading about history=92s idiots/ idiotics, you can=92t go past these two=
=20
250-page volumes.
But first, a quiz to test your knowledge of some Very Important Trivia:
(Greatest Scandals): 1. America=92s =91worst president=92, who according =
to e=20
e cummings was =91the only man, woman or child who could write a simple=20
declarative sentence with seven grammatical errors=92.
2. Another US president who was =91an introvert in an extrovert=92s
job=92=
who=20
spent his last night in office drinking, sobbing and praying.
3. He said =91power is the ultimate aphrodisiac=92.
4. Among her lingerie she had a bullet-proof bra.
5. This statement got into Bartlett=92s =91Familiar Quotations=92: =91If =
=93is=94=20
means is and never has been, that is one thing. If it means there is=20
none, that was a completely true statement.=92
6. When she died at 67 tales persisted that she=92d been crushed by a=20
horse while attempting to have sex.
7. =91Demons made me do it but Oral Roberts cast them out over the
phone=92.
8. He created headlines like =91Man Raped by Banana=92.
9. This evangelist amassed a personal fortune of $158 million which he=20
stashed in 47 different accounts =96 and they were only the ones in his n=
ame.
10. Neighbours in the Sydney suburb of Palm Beach heard her crying at=20
night for months on end.
(Worst Decisions): 11. He tried to kill his mother, three times with=20
poison, and one by rigging the ceiling to cave in while she lay in bed.
12. This pope lasted only a month before a papal sceptre was broken
over=20
him and he was carried off to a monastery.
13. His army was destroyed because the enemy moved backwards faster
than=20
his could move forwards.
14. His rabbits migrated faster than any colonizing mammal anywhere in=20
the world.
15. Stanley delivered a territory 80 times larger than Belgium to him,=20
and was then deemed his private property =96 a personal domain probably=20
without precedent in history.
16. It was then the world=92s largest movable object =96 with four funnel=
s,=20
only three of which were actually usable; one was just for ostentation.
17. He was good in history and weak in geography, and ordered a=20
ridiculous assault with inexperienced soldiers against an impregnable=20
terrain with no strategic importance at all. He also said =91I don=92t=20
understand this squeamishness about the use of gas. I am strongly in=20
favour of using poisoned gas against uncivilized tribes.=92
18. Another military leader ordered operations which resulted in over a=20
million casualties in six months with absolutely no gain whatsoever.
19. He killed half the leadership of his country during two years.
20. =91This outstandingly safe drug can be given with complete safety
to=20
pregnant mothers without adverse effects on mother or child.=92 Result:=20
12,000 born with birth defects, and of those one-third died in their=20
first year.
You get the idea. The authors are British, but the Idiotica covers a=20
good selection from all times and places (the earliest =96 Adam and Eve!)=
..=20
They write interestingly, but the proof-readers did a poor job (with,=20
for example, a couple of dozen wrongly hyphenated words in the middle
of=20
lines).
Richard Rohr says we all need a good experience of humiliation every=20
day. These 80-odd humiliations are of a magnitude that is staggering.=20
You=92ll gratefully pray through these chapters, as I did, =91There but f=
or=20
the grace of God go I=85 Thank you Lord that my stupidities were played=20
out on a much smaller stage.=92 And the famous line from George Santayana=
=20
kept going through my head: =91Those who are ignorant of the past are=20
condemned to repeat it.=92
1. Warren Harding 2. Richard Nixon 3. Henry Kissinger 4. Imelda=20
Marcos 5. Bill Clinton 6. Catherine the Great 7, Jimmy Swaggart=20
8. Rev. Canaan Banana, president of Zimbabwe 1980-87) 9. Jim Bakker=20
10. Evdokia Petrov 11. Nero 12. Benedict V 13. Napoleon 14.=20
Thomas Austin 15. King Leopold 16. The Titanic 17. Winston
Churchill=20
(Gallipoli) 18. Douglas Haig 19. Joseph Stalin 20. Drug company=20
Grunenthal=92s drug thalidomide.
Rowland Croucher
April 2008
Shalom/Salaam/Pax!
http://jmm.aaa.net.au/
(20,000 articles 4000 humor)
Blogs - http://rowlandsblogs.blogspot.com/
Justice for Dawn Rowan - http://dawnrowansaga.blogspot.com/
Funny Jokes and Pics - http://funnyjokesnpics.blogspot.com/
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