You don't sew with a fork, so I see no reason to eat with knitting
needles. --Miss Piggy, on eating Chinese Food
Collaboration, n.: A literary partner****p based on the false assump-
tion that the other fellow can spell.
The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science
requires reasoning while those other subjects merely require schola-
r****p. --Robert Heinlein
Whom computers would destroy, they must first drive mad.
An American is a person who isn't afraid to criticize the President
but is always polite to traffic cops.
Graduate-Student Life -- it's not just a job, it's an indenture.
Hlade's Law: If you have a difficult task, give it to a lazy person
-- he or she will find an easier way to do it.
There's no time like the present for postponing what you ought to be
doing.
Taxes, n.: Of life's two certainties, the only one for which you can
get an extension.
Birth, n.: The first and direst of all disasters. --Ambrose Bierce,
"The Devil's Dictionary"
Teamwork is essential -- it allows you to blame someone else.
A budget is just a method of worrying before you spend money ... as
well as afterward.
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