[Because we are in the midst of the Presidential campaign
this year, HFTN brings you a story with a political
caution.]
OLD BUTCH
John the farmer was in the fertilized-egg business. He had
several hundred young layers (hens), called "pullets", and
ten roosters, whose job it was to fertilize the eggs.
The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform
went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful
lot of his time, so he bought a set of tiny bells and
attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different
tone so John could tell from a distance, which rooster was
performing. Now he could sit on the ****ch and fill out an
efficiency re****t simply by listening to the bells.
The farmer's favorite rooster was old Butch, a very fine
specimen he was, too. But on this particular morning John
noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all. John went to
investigate. The other roosters were chasing pullets,
bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming,
would run for cover.
But to Farmer John's amazement, old Butch had his bell in
his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet,
do his job and walk on to the next one. John was so proud
of old Butch, he entered him in the Renfrew County Fair and
he became an overnight sensation among the judges. The
result? The judges not only awarded old Butch the No Bell
Piece Prize but they also awarded him the Pullet Surprise as
well.
Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making: who else
but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most
highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at
sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they
weren't paying attention.
Vote carefully ... as the bells are not always audible.
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