Have you not witnessed the gloomy sadness upon the countenance, and
frequent
exhibitions of a morose temper in those who used to be cheerful, kind and
affectionate? They are easily excited to jealousy, disposed
7
to look upon the dark side, and when you are laboring for their good,
imagine that you are their enemy, that you needlessly reprove and restrain
them? {ApM 6.2}
And have you not enquired where will all this end, as you have looked
upon your children from a moral point of view? Have you not noticed the
increase of disobedience in children, and their manifestations of
ingratitude, and impatience under restraint? Have you not been alarmed at
their disregard of parental authority, which has bowed down the hearts of
their parents with grief and prematurely sprinkled their heads with grey
hairs? Have you not witnessed the lack of that noble frankness in your
children which they once possessed, and which you admired in them? Some
children even express in their countenances a hardened look of depravity.
Have you not felt distressed and anxious as you have seen the strong
desire
in your children to be with the opposite ***, and the overpowering
disposition they possessed to form attachments when quite young? With your
daughters, the boys have been the theme of conversation, and with your
sons
it has been the girls. They manifest preference for particular ones, and
your advice and warnings produce but little change. Blind passion destroys
sensible considerations. And although you may check the outward
manifestations, and you credit the promises of amendment yet to your
sorrow
you find there is no change, only to conceal the matter from you. There
are
still secret attachments, and stolen
8
interviews. They follow their willful course, and are controlled by their
passions, until you are startled by perhaps a premature marriage, or are
brought to shame by those who should by their noble course of conduct,
bring
to you respect and honor. The cases of premature marriage multiply. Boys
and
girls enter upon the marriage relation with unripe love, immature
judgment,
without noble, elevated feelings, and take upon themselves the marriage
vows, wholly led by their boyish, girlish, passions. They choose for
themselves often without the knowledge of the mother who has watched over
them, and cared for them, from their earliest infancy. {ApM 7.1}
Attachments formed in childhood have often resulted in a very
wretched
union or in a disgraceful separation. Early connections, if formed without
the consent of parents, have seldom proved happy. The young affections
should be restrained until the period arrives when sufficient age and
experience will make it honorable, and safe to unfetter them. Those who
will
not be restrained will be in danger of dragging out an unhappy existence.
A
youth not out of his teens, is a poor judge of the fitness of a person, as
young as himself, to be his companion for life. After their judgment
becomes
more matured, they view themselves bound for life to each other, perhaps
not
at all calculated to make each other happy. Then instead of making the
best
of their lot, recriminations take place, the breach widens, until there is
settled indifference and neglect. To them there
9
is nothing sacred in the word home. The very atmosphere is poisoned by
unloving words, and bitter reproaches. The offspring of such are placed in
a
much more unfavorable condition than were their parents. With such
surroundings, such examples, what could be expected of them if time should
continue? Mothers, the great cause of these physical, mental and moral
evils
is secret vice which inflames the passions, fevers the imagination, and
leads to licentiousness. This vice is laying waste the constitution, and
preparing the young for disease of almost every description. And shall we
permit our children to pursue a course of self-destruction? {ApM 8.1}
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