Too Big to Put Behind
Rachel Naomi Remen
Disappointment and loss are a part of every life. Many times we can put
them behind us
and get on with the rest of our lives. But not everything is amenable to
this approach. Some
things are too big or too deep to do this, and we will have to leave
im****tant parts of ourselves
behind if we treat them in this way. These are the places where wisdom
begins to grow in us.
It begins with suffering that we do not avoid or rationalize or put behind
us. It starts with the
realization that our loss, whatever it is, has become a part of us and has
altered our lives so
profoundly that we cannot go back to the way it was before.
The thing about the many strategies we use to shelter ourselves from
feeling loss is that none
of them leads to healing. Although denial, rationalization, substitution,
avoidance, and the like
may numb the pain of loss, every one of them hurts us in some far more
fundamental ways.
None is respectful toward life or toward process. None acknowledges our
capacity for finding
meaning or wisdom.
If this is the case, how should we heal?
http://www.griefcompanion.org/articles/Grieving.htm
Source: Rachel Naomi Remen, MD. "My Grandfather?s Blessings"
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